


Hug Me Tight

by Lady_Phenyx



Series: Fluffvember 2019 [16]
Category: Mumintroll | Moomins Series - Tove Jansson, 楽しいムーミン一家 | Moomin (Anime 1990)
Genre: Don't copy to another site, Found Family, Gen, Hugs
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-16
Updated: 2019-11-16
Packaged: 2021-02-07 11:56:05
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,863
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21457657
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lady_Phenyx/pseuds/Lady_Phenyx
Summary: Or, how Snufkin learned to accept and ask for hugs.Fluffvember Day 16: “I love your hugs./I just really need a hug right now…”
Series: Fluffvember 2019 [16]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1533602
Comments: 12
Kudos: 129





	Hug Me Tight

Snufkin couldn't remember the last time he'd hugged someone.

Between his own fiercely defended personal space and most people's dislike of vagabonds, (“Don't touch him, honey, you'll get fleas.” “No, you'll get dirty.” “You don't know where he's been!” Of course they didn't, that was the whole _idea!_ And so insulting, to boot. Snufkin bathed! He just...lived outside. You couldn't stay as clean as someone who never touched dirt if you lived outside. He'd never had a flea in his life!) Snufkin didn't have much experience with personal touch.

The Moomins, he was noticing more and more, touched a lot.

It was all casual, nothing they probably noticed. A touch to the back of a paw, brushing against each other, an arm around shoulders.

Snufkin had seen, more than once, one of them start to do one of the same casual gestures towards him only to pull their arm back, respecting his boundaries.

They didn't always remember in time, and he'd had his hand held, wrist grabbed, been touched more in the years since he'd started coming here than he could remember ever before.

And...he didn't really find that he minded.

He just wasn't sure how to explain that he was open to more, just he wasn't sure how much more, how to explain that around them the boundaries that had seemed so solid, so firm, were suddenly more like the tides, ebbing and flowing.

\---XXX---

Snufkin had seen how Moominmamma hugged the others – mostly Moomin, but she was just as willing to scoop up Snorkmaiden or Little My or Sniff, Ninny or Thingummy and Bob (small enough they were both hugged at once).

Little My especially got the 'thank goodness you're all right' hugs – little surprise as she was the most daring of them all, the most likely to put herself into danger. And Little My wasn't shy about throwing herself at Moominmamma for one, for the reassurance after a fright or just sure that Moominmamma would catch her, for that reassurance that she was still loved.

Snufkin never expected to get hugged like that. Whether it was a “thank goodness you're okay” or a “welcome home” or “It's all going to be all right.”

He could take care of himself, and they all knew it. And he was still a little leery of personal contact and didn't know yet how to signal that it was okay.

Even if part of him really wanted to know what one of those hugs felt like.

\---XXX---

Stinky hadn't meant for things to go this way, Snufkin was pretty sure. Stinky was manipulative and nasty and a bully, but even he had lines he didn't cross.

That thought didn't help right now as Snufkin dangled off the side of the cliff, clinging to the swaying rope with both paws. Up above, he could hear the others still shouting and knew it wasn't over.

He...might have to hang here awhile.

There was a noise from above, like an explosion, like the entire structure Stinky had thrown together coming to pieces all at once, and rocks and bits of wood flew over the side of the cliff.

Along with Little My.

Snufkin shoved off the cliff, swinging outward and grabbing the back of Little My's smock as she flew past. They swung back and smacked against the cliff and she latched onto Snufkin's smock, freeing his paw to grasp again at the rope.

Moomin's face appeared over the edge, flanked by Snorkmaiden, Moominmamma, Moominpappa, Sniff, and Snork.

“Snufkin! Little My! Are you all right?”

“Been better,” Snufkin said shortly.

“Hold on, we'll pull you up!”

“As if we were going to do anything else,” Little My grumbled softly, buried in Snufkin's smock, her legs wrapped around his waist and arms around his neck as she clung to the fabric.

The rope jerked a second later, cutting off anything Snufkin might have said in return.

They were hauled up as quickly as the ones above could pull, paws grasping at Snufkin's smock as soon a he was in reach and hauling them over the edge.

Moomin and Snorkmaiden held onto Snufkin's paws as Little My shook herself and was scooped up into Moominmamma's arms, both squeezing tight before letting go when Snufkin tugged, ever so gently.

He needed a minute to recover, for his paws to stop aching and shaking, before he could face everyone without giving away how shaken he was.

\---XXX---

Snufkin stood a little off to the side as the others examined the remains of Stinky's prank, still trying to catch his breath. That had been close, closer than he was happy with. Closer, he thought, than most of the others realized.

There was a white blur, and Snufkin looked up just in time to find himself enveloped in Moominmamma's arms.

He froze, shocked, as she clung. “I'm so sorry, but oh Snufkin, that was too close,” Moominmamma whispered, rubbing at his cheek with her snout. “Oh darling, we almost lost you. Are you hurt? Are you all right?”

“I...I'm fine,” he managed. Slowly his arms came up, and he found himself clinging to Moominmamma, pressing close, as how close it had been came in around him again. He could feel himself shaking, and Moominmamma rubbed at his back.

“Let it out, darling,” she said quietly. “You're safe, you don't have to be strong here.”

And so Snufkin clung, just for a bit. Just for a minute, and let himself be comforted.

He hadn't realized before how much he wanted, just once, for someone else to be in charge and comforting him. He'd known Moominmamma considered him one of hers, but it hadn't really sunk in until just now what that meant.

How he might get those 'thank goodness you're alive' hugs now.

He rubbed his cheek against her fur, and thought, _How lovely it is to have a mother._

\---XXX---

Now that Snufkin knew about his parents, he wondered sometimes.

Had they wanted him? Why was he left alone?

...would they want him if they met him now?

He knew a bit now about what it was like to have parents who loved you and wanted you around – he had been resisting it, but he couldn't deny anymore that Moominmamma and Moominpappa were becoming that for him as well.

He couldn't really find it to be upset about it like he'd once thought he'd be, the way he'd been the few times someone had tried to force themselves into that role.

But still...he wanted to meet them. His birth parents.

Little My threw herself at Snufkin as soon as he, almost timidly, asked if this meant she was his sister, as tightly as she had that day they'd hung from the cliff.

She clung, and he clung back tightly, two close friends turned siblings.

“Wait until Mymble hears about this,” Little My said wonderingly. “She was so upset when you and Joxter disappeared. And we never guessed.”

And though Snufkin wasn't always sure about hugs, he squeezed again, unwilling to let go, and Little My settled into his arms to hear the rest of Moominpappa's story, as if he would disappear once more if she let him out of her sight.

\---XXX---

Mymble cried when they told her. Snufkin hadn't expected that – she had so many siblings, what was one more?

He was one that was _lost_, Mymble pointed out, daubing at her eyes with her handkerchief. She'd thought there was a good chance he was dead, but he'd been coming here for years now and she'd never known.

And Snufkin found himself pulled into another hug.

These really were growing on him. Mymble was soft, and she smelled nice, and she hugged very different to Moominmamma or Little My (who was squeezing him around the waist).

He'd thought, once, that finding family would be smothering. But this...this was nicer than he'd ever thought it could be.

\---XXX---

Joxter raced through the forest.

It went against every instinct he had, but he had to know, and he couldn't waste any more time.

Moominpappa's letter crinkled in the pocket of his smock loudly with each step, the words already burned into his memory. None of them accusing, but all confused, wondering if he knew about Snufkin, if he'd like to meet him.

As if Joxter hadn't been looking for him for the last who-knew-how-long by now.

Joxter burst out of the trees and saw Mymble and Little My first. They recognized him as quickly as he did them, if the way Little My's eyes narrowed and Mymble's went wide said anything.

The mumrik between them Joxter would have recognized in his sleep, despite all the years that had passed.

Then their arms were around each other, and Joxter buried his face in his son's – his _son_, finally, _finally_ – hair as they cried.

And the story came out.

The chase, hiding Snufkin, leading them away. Coming back to find Snufkin gone. Searching, going back to beg Mymblemamma for help and finding them gone as well.

And a dozen apologies, all tumbling out over each other.

Unseen, Little My and Mymble looked to each other. Little My pouted, but rolled her eyes and nodded.

And two more pairs of arms joined their hug.

\---XXX---

He hadn't thought.

When he'd seen Ninny tumble from the dock into the water and heard her yell – Ninny, who hadn't learned how to swim yet, who was still a little afraid of the ocean – he threw his hat to the side and leapt in after her.

Ninny clung once he had a hold of her – that was always the danger of going after someone in the water, that in their panic they would grab onto their rescuer and take them both down – but despite her fear Ninny simply clung, and Snufkin was able to keep them both on the surface, slowly pulling them back towards the shore.

And, in the meantime, teaching Ninny how to float, to make it easier.

They were snatched out of the water, and both of them wrapped in towels, to Snufkin's surprise – he'd expected to wring the water out of his clothes himself, while Ninny was fussed over after the fright she'd had.

But no, they were both rushed off to Moomin House and their clothes taken to be washed and loaned spare pajamas (nice and old and broken in, just as Snufkin liked) and given hot chocolate and soup to warm up with while Moominmamma fussed over them both and Moominpappa peeked in on them again and again, telling stories and ruffling hair (not discriminating if it was Snufkin's or Ninny's).

Moomin and Snorkmaiden altered between worrying over them and admiring them, Ninny for keeping her head and Snufkin for rescuing her.

“Couldn't let my little sister drown,” Snufkin mumbled.

Ninny heard, and stared dumbstruck at Snufkin before flinging herself at him, wrapping her arms around him and burying her face in his chest.

Snorkmaiden was just fast enough to save Snufkin's hot chocolate before it could spill all over the blankets.

He awkwardly raised a paw and stroked her back, wrapping the other arm around her.

“Okay now...” he mumbled. “It's not a big deal...”

“It is,” Ninny said, muffled against his chest. She squeezed again, one last time, before leaning back.

She stayed nestled up against his side through Moominpappa's next story and the rest of the evening, both of them leaning against Joxter as he laid behind them, with Little My watching over them both, crankily grumbling about her siblings putting themselves in danger and how they were so teaching Ninny how to swim.

It was still a strange feeling, to be a brother at all, and yet, with the connection he felt with Ninny, both of them having been invisible once, both of them lost children that had found a home here...how could he not?

\---XXX---

This had been one hell of a winter.

Usually, winters were good. A time to rest after being in Moomin Valley all spring, summer, and winter, where people knew where to find Snufkin, where they could come up to him at a moment's notice. A time to wander about, to see new things and enjoy the feeling of walking alone for its own sake.

Staying in one place all the time could be exhausting, even with his small trips away, with how much he loved the people there, with a few special ones standing out from the crowd, to be so available. To know that someone could come up at any time and be there, asking for attention.

Usually, when things started to get rough during the winter, Snufkin just moved on. No sense in staying, not when there was nothing tying him somewhere.

But this time...it seemed like everyone wanted something from Snufkin. He had to dodge orphanage directors and the people who caught rogue orphans more than once – he was in his twenties, for Tove's sake, he should have been past the age he had to worry about them! Four times in one winter was beyond ridiculous!

Something was brewing in five different places, some tension, some unrest making him need to move on before he got caught up in something deeper than he could deal with.

The police were crankier than ever, and it seemed to Snufkin they were looking for scape goats. No rest there, but lots of dashing escapes and dark chases – and at least one that was so silly, looking back on it, he could hardly believe it had been real, involving chicken coops, two men carrying a huge pane of glass, and a talking donkey.

...Snufkin was sort of looking forward to telling people back in Moomin Valley about that one. And to think it was all over another melon! Why were police so obsessed with their melons?

He...wasn't sure he would tell them about the others, even if part of him wanted to go back and tell them everything, get it all off his chest and stop keeping it a secret. He didn't want them to worry.

Then there were the pirates, and the suspected vampires, and the brush with that creepy woman who'd seemed so friendly at first but she and her husband watched Snufkin so intently he'd found excuses to get out of there as quickly as he could. The ones who'd been arrested soon after he'd gotten out of there.

He just...this had not been a restful winter, and he could hardly believe all that had happened over it.

And Snufkin was heading back to Moomin Valley almost as, if not (more than possibly) more stressed and tired than he'd been when he'd left.

Snufkin knew it was reflected in his spring tune, but, well...he couldn't help it. Sometimes it just happened that way, and he couldn't hide anymore.

Moomin met him on the bridge, and Snufkin could tell from the way Moomin watched him that he'd picked up on the exhaustion in Snufkin's new song.

Moomin fiddled with his tail, even after all this time not quite sure how to help.

Snufkin slid the pack off his back and opened his arms. “Moomin? Maybe it's a little silly, but I think I could really use a hug right now.”

Moomin's mouth dropped open but he slid his arms around Snufkin, recovering quickly as Snufkin nestled into his arms.

Moomin had had a growth spurt recently, and he enveloped Snufkin in soft white fur and warmth.

And something tight in Snufkin's chest finally began to loosen.

Moomin took Snufkin's paw in his and led him up to Moomin House, where Moominmamma was standing on the veranda, watching them.

She held out her arms to Snufkin, and he slid into them, feeling like he was coming home – and the last bit of tightness dissolved.

“I love your hugs,” he said into her fur, muffled and soft. She stroked his hair, placing the hat back after.

“Was it a rough winter?” she asked gently. Snufkin nodded, rubbing his cheek against her fur.

“Why don't you come have some tea and tell us about it?” she said. “If you're ready to. Talking about things helps, I've found.”

Snufkin gave her another squeeze before stepping back. “Maybe it will, after all. I'd like some tea.”

Snorkmaiden was waiting inside the house, already setting out cups for the tea, and she hurried over as Snufkin came in. She paused, her fur speckling an anxious mauve, and opened her arms.

Snufkin slipped into them, wrapping his arms around her. Moomin stepped up behind them, tapping Snufkin's shoulder before wrapping his arms around them.

Little My yelled out from above, her weight landing on Snufkin's shoulders, and they all burst out laughing.

Snufkin squeezed tighter, loving the feel of arms around him, and all the stress of the winter melted away.

He'd have to take a small trip later in the summer, he thought, but for now, right here in their arms, in this place where they all were, where the rest of them would soon come to join them, father and sisters and family, he was really and truly _home._


End file.
